GOVERNMENT
If you have more g-ns in your home than books, your part of the problem
ME
All my g-ns come with owner’s manuals
Checkmate
AI is still a bit janky!
Hows old mates thumb jammed inside buttstock grip in the first pic, and the poor old melted/drooping front sight/barrel in the second pic 
1 Like
WOW LEGO HAS REALLY GOT INTOUCH WITH WHAT THE "WOKE BRIGADE WANT IN A TOY.
MY KIND OF GUN SHOP
I DID FIND IT FUNNY THAT THE FRENCH WOULD CALL IT “APACHE”.
BUT ON FURTHER THOUGH IT SOUNDS A LOT SCARIER THAN " CROISSANT"
He’s such a good looking bloke too, right? 
He’s got every right to have those expectations, doesn’t he?
I’d love to see the women who are drawn to that photo and listing… then again… no, I wouldn’t. 
QUESTION 
1: what was the group up to last night
2: what did you get up to
3: interesting group uniform wheres mine
4: why was I not invited
5: when is the next meeting
RETARDED GRANDPARENTS - (this was actually reported by a teacher)
After Christmas, a teacher asked her young pupils how they spent their holiday away from school.
One child wrote the following:
We always used to spend the holidays with Grandma and Grandpa.
They used to live in a big brick house but Grandpa got retarded and they moved to Batemans Bay where everyone lives in nice little houses, and so they don’t have to mow the grass anymore!
They ride around on their bicycles and scooters and wear name tags because they don’t know who they are anymore.
They go to a building called a wreck centre, but they must have got it fixed because it is all okay now. They do exercises there, but they don’t do them very well.
There is a swimming pool too, but they all jump up and down in it with hats on.
At their gate, there is a doll house with a little old man sitting in it. He watches all day so nobody can escape. Sometimes they sneak out, and go cruising in their golf carts!
Nobody there cooks, they just eat out.
And, they eat the same thing every night — early birds.
Some of the people can’t get out past the man in the doll house. The ones who do get out, bring food back to the wrecked centre for pot luck.
My Grandma says that Grandpa worked all his life to earn his retardment and says I should work hard so I can be retarded someday too.
When I earn my retardment, I want to be the man in the doll house. Then I will let people out, so they can visit their grandchildren.
PRICELESS!
Two Aussie fellas in a locker room were taking a shower after their game of footy, when one notices the other has a huge cork stuck in his bum!
If you don’t mind my asking said the second, ‘That cork looks uncomfortable. Why don’t you take it out?’
'I can’t, lamented the first fella. ‘It is permanently stuck in my bum.’ ‘I don’t understand,’ said the other, ‘how on earth?’ The first fella says, 'I was walking along Russell Street, and tripped over an oil lamp. There was a puff of smoke and a huge old man in Australian Flag attire, with a white beard and an Akubra hat appeared. He said, ‘I am Captain Aussie, the Genie, I can grant you one wish.’ I said, 'No shit!?
Two builders go into the pub after a hard day’s work. They’re sat drinking for a while when a very smartly dressed man walks in and orders a drink. The two began to speculate about what the man did for a living.
“I’ll bet he’s an accountant.” said the first builder.
“Looks more like a stockbroker to me.” argued the second. They continued to debate the subject for a good while until eventually the first builder needed to use the toilet. On walking in, he saw the smartly dressed man standing at a urinal.
“Excuse me mate, but me and my friend have been arguing over what a smartly dressed fella like you does for a living?” the builder said to the man.
Smiling the man replied, “I’m a logical scientist.”
“A what?” asked the builder.
“Let me explain” the man continued, “Do you have a goldfish at home?”
A bit puzzled, but intrigued the builder decided to play along, “Yes, I do as it happens.”
“Well then it’s logical to assume that you either keep it in a bowl or a pond. Which is it?”
“A pond” the builder replied.
“Well then it’s logical to assume that you have a large garden.” The builder nodded his agreement. So the man continued, “which means it’s logical to assume you have a large house.”
“I have a 6 bedroom house that I built myself.” the builder said proudly.
“Given that you have such a large house, it’s logical to assume that you are married…”
The builder nodded again, “Yes, I’m married and we have three children.”
“Then it’s logical to assume that you have a healthy sex life.”
“Five nights a week!” the builder boasted.
The man smiled a little, “Therefore it’s logical to assume you don’t masturbate often.”
“Never!” the builder exclaimed.
“Well there you have it” the man explained, “That’s logical science at work. From finding out that you have a goldfish, I’ve discovered the size of your garden, all about your house, your family and your sex life!”
The builder left, very impressed by the man’s talents. On returning to the bar the other builder asked, “I see that smart bloke was in there, did you find out what he does?”
“Yeah,” replied the first, “He’s a logical scientist.”
“A what?” the puzzled second builder asked.
“Let me explain” the first builder continued, “Do you have a goldfish at home?”
“No” replied his mate.
"Well, you’re a wanker then!
